Ok so now that everyone is ready to ditch their discernment, give into their mommy/daddy feels, and become parents and have their children play religious life, let's get to the good stuff. Oh. And don't ditch your discernment. ;)
College is a time where people are constantly (and, in my case, typically condescendingly) asking you what you are going to do with your major (because people who barely know what sociology is TOTALLY know what the job prospects look like for Sociology majors out of college, right? [sorry for the sass]), what you want to do with your life, and what your goals are.
I listened to this bomb podcast (look them up on iTunes. It's called UMD Newman Catholic Campus Ministry and its his recorded homilies and I listen to them seriously all the time when I am not busy talking about them and how awesome they are) and he talked a bit about it.
Before I continue, if you were to ask me what my life goal was and how I wanted to live out the rest of my life, I'd probably tell you my ultimate goal would be to get to Heaven (obvi) and live the rest of my life as the best Catholic woman I could be, bringing others to Christ alongside me.
Now, nothing is wrong with that at all and I still want that. But the priest in the podcast discussed a friend who said a similar thing. He wanted to be just a good, Catholic guy.
But the thing is, he explained, that's selling ourselves short. That's selling God short. We should want to become saints.
I remember months and months and months ago reading a quote about how you should be striving to be a saint.
I remember thinking yeah nice thought. Maybe I'll know a saint by the tiniest chance of fate. But never me. I'm not going into religious life. I'm probably going to get married and married people are never saints [note: this is false] and goodness knows I sure can't pay attention in mass so yeah. Sainthood ain't gonna be my jam.
Um wow Colleen. Way to believe in yourself and the power of God.
Guys, I could totally be a saint. You could be a saint. One day, people could be requesting me to pray for them (I totally call patron saint of organ transplants and veganism y'all). How amazing!
To become a saint, it takes absolutely nothing less than dedicating your entire life to Jesus Christ. That is exactly what I want to do. Every moment of my life, I want Him to be in my thoughts whether it be actively praying to Him in adoration or in the back of my mind as I am studying for a test. I want every action and word to be God inspired. Can you imagine if everything you did was inspired by God? Can you imagine seeking His counsel on every move you weren't sure how to make? Can you imagine how your whole life would just light on fire? And THEN, guess what? Heaven! Ahhhhh!!!!
It clicked with me that I could do that. Me. I probably won't have some great martyr story. I probably won't convert a country. Due to medical restrictions, I can't go off to some third world country and save babies (BUT FOR REAL GUYS IF I COULD OH MY GOODNESS...) But I can live the life of the saint and maybe become one some day. If I entrust God with my entire mind, body, and soul, I know I can live a life with Him that is beautiful. I want nothing more to do than His work. I want to give Him nothing less than all of me.
Through this project, that's what I have been starting to be able to do. Give Him all of me. Have you ever had one of those moments where you put God on the backburner and tell Him that His plan has to wait since you're working on yours? Like, "oh sorry God. Can't do the PeaceCorps that You want me to do because that conflicts with my plan of going to law school." I don't want those anymore! I want to trust Him completely and wholly. I do trust Him, but when it comes to showing that trust, I fail and do things "just in case." Really? Just in case God's plan stinks? Is that a joke? My plan is a joke compared to what God's is for me.
I am still making out God's plan for me and I've started to learn patience and what it means to take things one step at a time. One day, I will make Him the everything of my life and I'll be that much closer to becoming a saint and being so close to Him for eternity in His Heavenly Kingdom.
God bless and thanks for your prayers. =]
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